The proposal

I was very fortunate to meet Maria and felt very comfortable with her going on dates and talking. We talked for hours and shared things and just felt natural together. We dated for almost a year when she asked me how I felt about family and marriage. I was a bit surprised but since I have not had the experience of dating much before I felt it was something that I had not really thought about but certainly had hoped for with the right girl. Sometimes there are mysteries in life as to how 2 people of the opposite sex come together. I remember when I was a young boy I would think about the girl I would marry and just felt like it was magical in so many ways because when you think about it you can really make yourself go into a dream like fantasy wondering how old is she?, where does she live?, what does she like to do?, is she shy like me?, what does she look like?, What school does she go to?, Does she have a lot of friends?, and so on and so on. I remember my dad would tell me there is a girl out there and she is waiting for you. I was just amazed about this and felt like there really is a meaning as to how couples get together. I felt that by going to the psychologist when I was going through my depression I was helping myself. Little did I know that by going I was also setting in motion the chance visit with Maria. It just seems like fate when we came together like it was meant to be. I remember growing up and during my high school days I had crushes on girls but I was very shy and did not feel ready. I always felt I had to be accomplished before I met a girl which now I look back on and feel is a bit silly. I always admired women and felt good when I could open up and talk. As I get older I find it is getting easier.

So in answer to Maria’s question I thought real hard about it and told her to give me a week to think about it. I had planned to take her out the next weekend and told her I would let her know my feelings about marriage and family.

My dad was one person I always looked up to and he was very special to me. If I could talk to anyone about something as important as this it certainly was him. I talked to him and asked him when do you know you are with the right person and when it is time to ask about taking her hand in marriage and my dad looked at me straight in the eyes and said you will know when your heart tells you so and I looked back at him and I said I think I am falling in love with Maria and would like to marry her. He then asked me if I was committed enough to stick by her side and to bring a child into the world and love them both and take care of them both for the rest of my life and I said that I would consider it a gift from God to marry and be blessed with a child. So after my discussion I knew what my answer was. I did not know if I could last the week as I felt marriage proposals were spontaneous so I arranged a meeting where I would have a joint session at the psychologist’s office midweek and asked her if she could attend. She said she could schedule for Wednesday. I told her that day was fine and I hoped we could schedule that day with Michele, our psychologist. It turned out that she could not schedule that week because she was attending seminars but would be available on Monday. I told her I would have to get back to her because I was hoping to propose to Maria at the psychologist’s office. After I told her that she said she would be available for Wednesday and she would reschedule her seminar and would be honored to share in the proposal. My only concern now was how would I propose and when. If I did it in the beginning and she accepted then the session would be a celebration. If I asked and she refused then the session would be a disaster. The end of the session also seemed to pose some problems and moments of awkwardness.

So I decided I would propose to Maria as we drove up to her office instead. I did not want to make her feel awkward in front of anyone.

Usually I take the train to work and the subway to the psychologist’s office. Today instead I decided I would drive in and meet Maria in front of her office and have her wait in my car but it was not practical so I had to change my plans again. I knew exactly how I would propose.

I called Michelle to inform her we were planning to make the appointment but I would use the session as an ordinary session and I would propose to her at the restaurant down the block from her office after our session and she agreed that was a great idea.

So I made it to the appointment on time and told Maria to meet me up at Michelle’s office once she get’s there. She was there actually before I was and they were both talking. I greeted them both and took my seat next to Maria and we started the session. Michele asked how we were and what would we like to discuss. I led the conversation by saying that Maria and I were doing well and that we have been dating for almost a year and I felt very happy and felt I have come a long way from when I first started our sessions and felt good having joint sessions with Maria. I told her about the things we were doing together and that I felt comfortable with her. Michele then asked Maria how she felt and she said she also was happy that we met and she enjoys being with me. The session was a good one and Michele made us feel very comfortable. She asked us if we wished to discuss anything else and I asked her a question I asked my dad and that was When do you know when you found the right person? She was taken aback at first and then replied that you know you found the right person when you can be yourself and know that you have mutual feelings for each other. I agreed and I then proceeded to ask Maria how she felt about spending the rest of her life with me and she at first was stunned so I got down on my knees in Michele’s office and I asked her if she would marry me and to my delight she said Yes and she started to cry as did I since I was holding all this emotion inside of me and felt such incredible relief and happiness and so our session that day became a celebration and we topped it off by going to the greek restaurant down the block and as we were preparing to leave Michelle’s office she gave us both the tightest hug and she began to cry as well. We were all crying tears of joy and she told us that our proposal was the first one she witnessed in her office and she said she was so happy for the two of us and we thanked her and headed for dinner and then for home. We were now preparing for our life together.

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